Rankings Review, Sept. 2...

New AP and Coaches' rankings are out and USC is now No. 1, presumably because they won more impressively than previous No. 1 Georgia did. I can't blame pollsters, though. USC looked absolutely off the hizz against Virginia on Saturday, while Georgia won at home against (Insert Name of Week One Cupcake School Here).

A few other things to note:

Clemson fell off a cliff in the AP poll --- from No. 9 to that Island of Misfit Toys: "others receiving votes." Ouch, as in rip-off-a-Band-Aid ouch.

The younger-than-my-little-sister Mountain West Conference has more teams in the Top 25 (2) than the, ahem, Atlantic Coast Conference (1). Double ouch.

The Coaches were impressed with Oregon's evisceration (read: disembowelment) of Ty Will's Washington Huskies as the Ducks moved up to No. 16 from No. 21. I was impressed, too. Duck Fans: Long live your loud and structurally lopsided stadium.

Four of the Top 10 teams are from the Southeastern Conference, which as of right now is the anti-ACC, which is to say the conference actually wins non-conference games. If the SEC gets any better, they'll have to rename it the NFC West.

Some pollsters were apparently high on glue fumes when they cast ballots in the preseason. In the AP poll, Hawaii garnered one vote (They lost to Florida by 46). In the Coaches' poll, Texas A&M received three votes (They were eaten alive, digested and then spit out by the Arkansas State Red Wolves); Louisville got two votes (They have done absolutely nothing special since, oh, 2006-ish).

Remarkably, Virginia, which looked like a Kermit-the-Frog-without-the-puppeteer rag doll against USC, got 12 votes (12!) Riddle me this, what did Virginia do in pads this summer that signaled to pollsters, "Boy, this team has a chance to beat the Trojans?" Who is voting in these polls? The beat writer for the Charlottesville Is Awesome Times?

Regardless of their flaws, I love polls. Let's rank everything, I say: Coffee drinks. Hair pieces. Cough syrup quality. In fact, someone could rank grass seed and people would be fascinated (My vote, while we're on the topic, would be Scott's Pure Premium Fenway Fescue).