What I learned from watching television...

Here's a summary of what we learned from the first night of college football:

1. You need a quarterback to be competitive. Did you see NC State and Baylor struggle to move the ball? (Heck, they struggled to snap the ball.) Without a quarterback, you, College Football Team X, are dead in the water.

2. Wake Forest is really good. They may not be Florida good, or even Clemson good. But this is a football team that is going to make some noise this year.

3. Baylor is bad. They may not be South Dakota State bad. But this is a football team that is going to get stepped on repeatedly in conference this year unless they show marked improvement.

4. South Carolina needs an offense. Yes, the box score looks impressive: 34-0 over NC State. But the game was 3-0 at the half and 13-0 into the fourth quarter. And all of those points were off of turnovers. If the 'Cocks want to be even remotely competitive in the SEC this year, they need to actually pass the ball to their own receivers and not their opponents, like they did four times.

5. Ted Kim gets a sick number of college football channels on satellite. Let me put it this way: At one point, I was switching between the South Dakota State/Iowa State and Hofstra/Connecticut games. Disgusting, I know.

6. Lou Holtz needs to lay off the make up, especially when he's on ESPN high def. It's a new era, Lou. We can see every dimple and mole. You can't powder your way out of age.